"It Takes Two to Tango."

One of my favorite adages is, "it takes two to tango." It reminds us that in any given situation or circumstance, we have to ask ourselves, "what did I bring to the table here? How did my behavior impact the situation? What could I have said or done that brought on this scenario?" You can often gauge a person's maturity level depending on how (or even, whether) a person asks these questions.

How many times have you heard someone complaining about "...they did this, and then they did that..." with an indignant tone of disbelief. Yet they've failed completely to examine how they may have played a role in the drama.

This adage also reminds me of, "There are three versions of the truth: what I said, what you said, and what really happened." Can we ever really be objective? Well, yes, but it's hard. It's a constant balancing act of really be in touch with our emotions, while simultaneously acknowledging and respecting the other person's point of view. Yet sometimes it amazes me how differently two people can experience the same situation.

One strategy I've employed, with some success, is to listen. Not just "listen," but REALLY LISTEN to what a person is saying. Listening is a hugely underrated skill, especially in our 24/7 fast-paced world, in which we're constantly bombarded by interruptions and distractions. I've often been in conversations in which I sensed that the other person was merely waiting for me to finish a sentence, so that they could begin talking. I find this so annoying that I try diligently to not do it to anyone. When conversing with someone, I make it a point to make eye contact and truly engage (which can occasionally be off-putting to shallow, cavalier people). (This could be why I much prefer talking to someone "live" instead of on the phone; to me, there's so many missed opportunities for engagement while on the phone.)