What is my “life philosophy”? What are my grounding principles? What are the core tenets that drive my attitudes and behaviors? What are, essentially, my values? I think so many people ponder these questions as they approach middle age. Also, many people wrestle with these core questions as they’ve faced a major life crisis (death of a beloved parent) or a major identity challenge (coming out and living as a gay woman), or another type of major life event (giving birth and co-parenting a daughter). As I’ve pondered and developed my values, what I’ve found is that I am not easily categorized as “a tattoo’d lefty lesbian” or “Weird Christian sicko” or this or that. What I’ve found is that my faith in God helps me immensely with following the Four Agreements: be meticulous with your words, don’t make assumptions, don’t take things personally, and always do your best.
I have found these four agreements to be a life-affirming and highly positive way to live my life. Why does my faith help me follow the four agreements? Because my faith fosters humility and compassion. Because my faith diminishes my ego. Because my faith fosters reverence in something beyond myself. My faith does not make me a dim-witted anti-intellectual lemming. My faith actually diminishes the arrogance that a lack of faith can foster. Instead, my faith fosters these practices of questioning, of pondering the meaning of the “big picture.” And most importantly, my faith challenges me to avoid stridency, to rest assured that I do not have all the answers. The way I practice my faith, I am led to places that I can seek only with an open mind. Stridency, I have found, leads to fundamentalism. And fundamentalism is dangerous, regardless of whether it’s practiced by Christians, Jews, atheists, or Muslims, or whomever. Fundamentalism negates the rich variety of human experience amongst and across our nearly seven billion inhabitants of Earth. Fundamentalism also negates the rich variety of humanity within each person. Fundamentalism fosters a narrow and confining view of “legitimate” beliefs, attitudes and behaviors.
So, where do I stand on “the issues”? My faith has driven me to the following perspectives on the following:
Drug policy – I am firmly against the criminalization of Marijuana. The “war on drugs” has failed, has promoted grotesque violence, and has created and fostered a dangerous black market that has exploited humanity. I believe that we should align our policy on marijuana purchase and consumption along the same lines as alcohol: that is, a controlled, taxed substance, available only to adults 21 years and older. I believe it is inhumane to criminalize a substance that is a medical benefit to those suffering with ailments such as cancer and AIDS. I am neutral on marijuana for recreational purposes. If alcohol is consumed for recreational purposes, I believe that we should stop the hypocrisy and treat marijuana the same way. Decriminalizing marijuana would also drive significant reduction of incarceration rates across our country. I believe that decriminalizing marijuana is a humane and compassionate act. Would we deny a sufferer access to her pharmaceutical pain medications? Of course not; so by what rationale would we deny her a natural substance that is just as efficacious (and perhaps with fewer side effects) as a pain reliever? And who are we to judge how another treats her pain?
Abortion – Ever since I became a parent, my stance on abortion has evolved substantially. I used to be a strident pro-choice feminist fundamentalist. Now, I am what you might call “pro-child” – I do believe that we must hold in utmost reverence every conception. There is an aspect to this debate that I think proves its core nuance; and that is: many aspects of life are unplanned, AND, many aspects of life are unpredictable (despite our “best laid plans” and our frankly tenuous control over our life’s course). That is, sometimes a pregnancy is unplanned. This is a fact. The question is, how do we react to such a fact? With casual disregard, or with utmost reverence for the sanctity of life? I don’t think there’s a whole lot of wiggle room here. Abortion ends a life and all of its potential. The parents must wrestle with the enormity of this fact and all its implications.
Capital punishment – I believe that state-sanctioned killing is appalling and I am utterly against it. Now, I am not saying that evil doesn’t exist; I acknowledge that horrible crimes are committed by truly sick individuals. But I cannot justify killing these individuals, either as a “deterrent,” or as a safe-guard against their escape from prison, or as a safe-guard against an eventual release back into society. If we truly believe the goal of rehabilitation of prisoners, how does killing them rehabilitate them? Or, let’s be frank about the goal: if the goal isn’t rehabilitation but is merely human warehousing, let’s call it what it is. And if we have resorted to the practice of warehousing humans, we have other issues to evaluate.
“Free” Trade – While I firmly believe that Capitalism is the most efficient and benign form of economic system, I do not believe that “just let the markets run themselves” is a mantra that is legitimate. I believe that government market regulations are necessary to rectify the innate unfairness of life. Look folks, life isn’t fair; can we all agree on that? So, government regulations can serve to mitigate the unfairness of life and markets, and discourage exploitation.
Conspicuous consumption / mother earth / “global warming/climate change” – I believe strongly that we must be responsible stewards of our home, planet Earth. What are the aspects of good stewardship? Responsible consumption; being aware of our consumption and how we contribute to potentially wasteful practices. Diminishing a “hoarding” attitude that encourages massive purchasing of goods and often ends up in waste. Fostering a “sharing” attitude that encourages joint purchases of big-ticket items (lawn mowers, etc.). Evaluating ways we can consume less, waste less, share more.
Feminism – to me, feminism is all about opportunity and equal access. Do girls and women have equal opportunity? This question always leads me to education. Women for Women International, an advocacy group for women around the world (especially for women in war-torn countries, the most vulnerable amongst us), has made one of its core endeavors to ensure equal access to education for all girls, across cultures, across socio-economic status. Educated women have much more opportunity to lift themselves and their families out of poverty. And, there is no question that women should receive equal pay for equal work; this is non-negotiable. These are the milestones for which to strive: equal opportunity, equal access to quality education, equal pay. Period.
Gay marriage – this is an issue that, to me, is a no-brainer. Why would we ever discourage two people whom have expressed the willingness and desire to make a life-time commitment to one another? This is a non-trivial commitment that has deep societal implications. I am in favor of extending all marriage laws, benefits and responsibilities to same-sex couples. For the contingency against “gay marriage” because it somehow dilutes the “sanctity” of marriage, I would encourage them to instead devote their efforts to outlawing divorce.
Public education – I am a strong advocate of public education; I think we must have a broad and deep perspective on this issue. That is, we must acknowledge that our K-12 public education is the foundation of the next generation of our citizenry. We cannot underestimate the importance of the power of public education to shape our citizenry. I believe we must overhaul our public education system to redefine its goal: that is, the goal of public education is to enable each child to become a responsible, law-abiding, employable, tax-paying citizen. This is a loaded statement; we must facilitate each child’s ability to secure a job that will enable them to earn a living. WE MUST UNDERSTAND THAT EACH PERSON MUST BE ABLE TO EARN A LIVING. This is a tall order for our public education system, but I believe it’s a goal for which we must strive.